MLC

Sheetal Makhija shares her story about moving on after a divorce and discovering her passion. 

“I am from Mumbai and currently stay in Ahmedabad for work. I work as an IBM SME and provide training in various technologies. I am also planning on starting my blog and working on my writing skills. 

My separation was, for want of a better word, bizarre. We dated for four years and were married for almost five years before I got divorced. There were no significant fights except for the conflicts in the last two weeks before the separation. The reason was that he told me that he had met someone else six months back and wanted to get married to her. 

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The separation was excruciating. I was highly suicidal then; my mom had my younger sister come and take me home. Thanks to one of my friends, I attended a life transformation program, and it changed my life completely. The first activity was looking in a mirror and telling yourself, ‘I love you’. I couldn’t even look at myself for a second, and my friend remarked that she couldn’t believe I didn’t have any self-confidence. I guess the self-discovery is what gave me the strength to start.

Before the life transformation seminar, words like self-love and self-confidence didn’t exist. I didn’t even know that loving myself is one of the most important things, and it is not being vain.

Initially, I let my family hide that I was separated; they were uncomfortable sharing it and assumed that people would point fingers at me. However, once I learned to love myself and started having more self-confidence, I didn’t give a damn about what people thought about me. I have only one thing to tell people–my life, my choice. No one came to help me when I was depressed, so how does their opinion matter?

“If you can’t love yourself, how can you expect others to love you?”

Finding my passion was another journey for me. I have realised I love training and writing both. I am a tech SME cum trainer for IBM and a writer. I get to learn something new every day, and interacting with students half my age is a learning experience, along with the fact that since I train in technology, I have to keep updating myself. Writing is love and comes naturally. 

Right now, I love everything about myself. My energy, vibe, smile, eyes, and the fact that I don’t hesitate to try something new.

For people looking to get out of a bad relationship but hesitate because they don’t believe in themselves, here’s what I have to say: If you can’t love yourself, how can you expect others to love you?  

For this year, along with loving myself, my goals are simple. Get fitter. Complete bungee jumping. Start my podcast and my blog.”

Lead image via Sheetal Makhija.
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